I Went He Came

I am his darling and so was my sister. He had taken utmost care in nurturing both me and my sister. But it was my sister’s fate and his bad time that I need to be in his life. His passion oozes out in his very appearance and I feel it increases when he sees me, touches me and speaks about me. May be I am selfish and I am not sure whether he feels the same. But I am happy about this feeling and I will stick to this irrespective of the actual truth, if otherwise.

I and my sister had a purpose to serve in his life. We were supposed to go where he asks us to go and collect what he wants us to collect and give them to him. He had this purpose first and then he found out both of us, one by one. So the purpose drove him to us.

Before my sister, he had faced many more similar candidates, but she was first of her kind. Her association with him was first in that special category. Any first travel is an exciting and an anxious one. During his association with my sister, he lost both his parents. In both the instances of the debacle, he went attended the final rituals, came back and gathered himself and got himself involved with my sister. That was one of the many instances that emphasized his love towards my sister. Day had come, when my sister need to leave him and go on her purpose. This was the day, he was waiting for and it turned out to be the day that he wants to forget. My sister died on the way.

You search for all what you want and procure them. Added to these, life also provides you with all what you do not need. At many points of time, you are pushed to the corner. But then, it is your determination that makes you come out of the corner with a push of your leg. He was a classic example.

He had dedicated his heart, soul and mind in her. Now, she is no more and I am in his life. His romance towards me did not compromise in anyway compared to the affection that he had with my sister. The time we had spent together was memorable and sweet. I always had a question, why does he spend lots of his time and energy, if he wants me to go away from him. What does the love on a person mean, when you have purpose to depart from that person? As my association with him extended over hours, days, weeks and months, my concern and question was more solidified and wanted to get clarity.

“Why do you have so much affection to me, when you know, I will go away one day? You are the reason why I am here and you want me not to be here.”

“Everyone has to go one day, even me. Thought of losing should never get into one’s mind, as that will make him lose himself”

“It is not only that you will miss me, but I will also miss you. I am not able to understand the whole exercise that we are undergoing.”

“All that happens, happens for a reason. We were separate and now we are together. We are going to get separated; we will be together one day. Don’t worry, I will join you someday.”

With a feeling of convinced, yet not, I was ready to undergo whatever it takes.

One day, we had visitors and his elders to visit our abode. The regular chat was going on. All of them raised their eyebrows and were skeptical about our association. All the quotations and statements had a reference to what happened to my sister during her travel. They painted a negative shade, indicating they won’t be surprised, if the same happens to me also. He was composed externally, but I know how he was taking the pain internally. Once they did the damage and left us alone, I felt that we were left in an empty land. I suffered and felt the sufferings that he had. But the way he re-gained himself and set himself onwards and prepared me for the travel was exemplary. Still, the incident has pinned an extra-caution in his mind. He took extra care, wanted to make sure that I am safe in my purpose and do not land up in where my sister did.

Again, the day had come. Life gives everyone a chance, if that did not succeed; it provides you with the second chance. Those who wait and see the second chance, wins and those who succumb to the first chance failure, miss the second option. He does not give up. His philosophy was, together we were happy and as we part, we will be happier. Even though I thought I understood, I found it difficult to digest this fact. Realization and experience are orthogonal.

I was ready in the room, waiting to leave him. I observed him carefully as he walked to the door. I knew that time was running out but suppressed the urge to check my watch. I took a deep breath and started counting in reverse under my breath. "Ten, nine, eight, and seven..."

As the count reached zero, I was travelling. It happened and yes, my departure happened. All through my way, I was crying, thinking of what we did together, thinking of what he will do now and thinking of what he will do without me, thinking of what I will do without him, thinking of what he will be thinking now, thinking of whether he will be thinking of what I will be thinking.

I reached where I am supposed to. After unfolding myself, I got ready to execute the “purpose”, that he wanted me to. Explored the place, clicked lots of photos, and informed him about the current weather, about the new terrains. I shared all. I took a while to settle in the new environment and got used to it as days proceed.

In one of the initial days, I realized that all through my stay away from him, it was only me who was contacting him and providing him information about all what I have to tell him, but I could not hear much from him. I was filled with his thoughts and unanswered questions.

Time has this uncanny trick to make you forget the most important event and the important person in your life. Yes, I was so busy with my schedule that I almost forgot my past-life and our separation.

On a day, when I met another sister, similar to me on the walk-way, I realized how much I was indulged in my work and did not think about him. We had our general introduction and she was in the same state as I was, when I came here. Getting a little curious, I asked her, how did she land up here? Yes, she told his name and that took me to my old memories.

Now, I started to realize the purpose that is associated with every one’s life. I had a purpose to do what I am doing and he had a purpose to send more of us here, to do what we are doing. All of us are driven by a purpose.

I missed him more after meeting her and started thinking about him again. His thoughts and just thoughts are very sweet. Next few days were empty, filled with his thoughts. As days went by, I became very week and wanted him with me. I wanted to talk to him and ask him all questions, I had, how is he? How is he feeling without me? How is he managing our separation? Is there a way for me to reach out to him? Is there a way I can be back with him?  How will I ask all what I wanted to ask? Will he listen to my questions? Will he understand my feelings? Will he be with someone else, preparing her to send to where I am? Will he remember me?

Please believe, all your questions are answered. Yes mine was also. He is with me now. I remembered his words, saying he will join me one day. He has his purpose completed and joined us. I am sure, people at his place will miss him, but all of us here were so much incomplete without him. Now, we are together.

I, the second model of SLV3, missed our beloved Kalam for so much time. He joined me approximately two months back and I feel I am reliving my life with him here. I know all of you miss him so much. Please understand, all of you have a purpose, once you complete your purpose to the completeness, you can join us and we can be together. But beware; we have space only for those who complete their purpose with full passion, determination and perseverance. Take care and dream big.