WHITE

The Essence of life is in the difference

between presence and absence

I am the presence, in the absence of the absence

I, the presence, present you more of sense…

But, unfortunately you pick up all non-sense

I say I’m pure and you

Read it as Impure

All the shades, in me, I host,

But you use me to portray Ghost.

I show you peace

Instead you tag me to represent a race

Perspective changes, but reality prevails

I am the reality and yes,

I am WHITE

I (am an) ACT(R)LESS

Me, Today morning

I was slapped. Sun entered via the top most sunshade of my bedroom and slapped me on my face. His heat was too much that I need to terminate the affair that I was having with my dream. If you can get up from your sleep at that time you plan to, then you can do anything you want – I read somewhere and realize now. My Living room is also confused as much as I am. The room, even after being big and having enough couches, I did not have a place to sit.  I slowly walked towards the kitchen, to get some coffee. Decoction was not enough, milk was not available and sugar was mixed with salt. 

I was not sure of the way to proceed and that is when, the calling bell did what it is supposed to. It was two middle aged women, who were from “Parents’ mistake” orphanage requesting me to donate for the children. Why should I donate and why should only I donate? I shouted at them and sent them off. I know they were upset and I don’t care.

I got deep into the thoughts about my work backlog. I have couple of more schedules to finish and that is going to take whole of today. How am I going to bare this load? Challenges teach you a lot once you complete those. When you are in the middle of executing the challenge, they toil you and the vision of the learning that you get, is very misty.

Engrossed in thoughts, I entered my bath room, hoping to a have a peaceful shower. Water was cool and I started to enjoy. Anything you start should come to an end, and here, the end came so soon that I did not even realize that I started. It was the noise created by a group of people at my gate, with flash lights, microphones and cameras. My security was trying to do his job, but the crowd was trying to do theirs’, i.e. to get into my house. I called the security and asked them to let the crowd in. Whatever condition you are in, being a public entertainer, you better be in the good books of press and media.

I opened the door and let them in. They were congratulating me and clicking me continuously. Flashes were too harsh for my eyes, that still had the hangover of my sleep. I was told that I got the most prestigious “Sauce-car” award in the best actress category for my performance in the previous film. I thanked them for the news and made sure they leave soon. I could very easily notice that they were not happy about my reaction and they were surprised that I am not that as much happy as they expected me to be.

As I was getting ready, she came running. I just stared at her and asked her to get lost once for all. She had tears in her eyes and she was apologizing, which I did not want to hear. At last, I told her to accompany me and take my make-up kit with a warning that the next instance of similar occurrence will be the last instance.

Car carried both of us towards the shooting spot.

----

Me, fifteen days ago

I want to come back. I know that and my conscious is very clear about that fact. Conscious never lies. But unfortunately conscious’ s voice and hence the truth are very feeble to hear. How loud should I shout to make others aware of this fact.

By the way, Who am I?

Am I just the conscious of the body lying here? Or am I the complete ME? Is my life decided by the pulse and the heartbeat or the state of the conscious?

Can someone be half-alive? Isn’t liveliness a state and isn’t the transition discrete? Then what does it mean to say that I am in Coma.

What is the language that I need to speak, so that I can convey what I want to? I have a lot of work.

How did I land up here? What happened to me? Why am I not able to regain all what I was thinking?

I heard the conversation between doctor and a police man. They were in anxiety because of me and my health status. More than these, what troubles them, and of course me is that, the un-awareness of why am I here and who am I?

They were also worried that if this state continues who is going to take care of the expenses for my treatment.

I have to come back and tell them not to worry about that as I am supposed to be rich.

Communication is so under-developed that even a conscious of a man who is in coma cannot interact with outsiders.

----

Me, A month ago

I was kissed. Any morning awakening with a kiss is a bliss. When I opened my eyes slowly, I could see Sun rays, stretched in my room, as a yellow carpet, to welcome me from my dreams to the real life.  Is this a dream, I was thinking, and this time, reality was more exciting than the affair that I had with my dream. Jumped off my bed, I walked towards my living room. Couches were waiting to have me in their lap and one of them was lucky enough. Marriage of black decoction and white milk resulted in a sweet nice coffee. I completed my coffee and had a refreshing bath. Dressed up myself with my favorite dress, I was looking at the schedule for the day, which is supposed to start in another half an hour.

My mental map was clear about my day and I was charged up face the same. That is the time, I heard the calling bell buzz. It was two middle aged women, who were from “God’s gift” orphanage requesting me to donate for the children. I felt so bad for the small kids. I gave them a cheque filled with hefty amount and asked them to contact me any time, whenever they are in need of any type of assistance.

The feel that you are able to help others gives you a sense of achievement. How many people in the world are provided with the mentality to help, facility to help and the chance to help. I felt I was blessed. Day looked brighter for me and I am ready to face the day with full of involvement.  Any work you do with involvement fetches you more than what you deserve. My walk with this thought let me to the hall at the lower basement. 

Cameras winked at me and I was happy to caste a pose. I settled the crowd and took the center seat. Press and media give me that encouragement to push myself more and half of what I am is because of them. I told about my new movie and the challenging role that I have to do in that movie. There were lots of questions about my role, the movie, the producer, co-stars etc... At the end, I also told that I will have my next meet once I complete the movie as I will be completely engrossed in the movie and the movie demands me not to meet any one externally. For the last statement, I got questions about why was that restriction, was it from the director or from the production unit. I smiled and asked them to enjoy the nourishment and wish me good luck for the new venture.

As I was getting ready, she came running. I just asked her to relax. She apologized for being late. I consoled her and told her not to feel bad. She picked up my make-up kit and was ready promptly. I appreciated her sincerity and we were ready

Car carried both of us towards the shooting spot.

----

Me, A month ago

I am excited. This is my first day here, waiting to meet more new friends. Any change, is pleasant. Change from your abode, upgradation from school to college, change from boy to man and many more. Regular formalities completed and I finished my first class in college. It was a different experience -- the teachers, class room, teaching techniques, laboratories, food stalls everything was different. Day was getting over and it was the time, that I was anxious about – night stay in the hostel room.

We were six in a room and I got a cot that is in the corner. After regular introduction, I pretended to engross into the book. Initially my room mates ignored me, but as their discussion was heating up, I was pulled in. I tried not to be a part of it, but it is a difficult to continue the same way. I participated in the discussion, with my facial expressions and gestures. Slowly these got converted into one word answers, followed by a line long statement and a complete conversation.

As long as the discussion was about sports, national interest, income tax and black money, I was active into it. When the topics got personal, I once again tried to avoid. But once you are neck deep into it, unless you are good swimmer, you can’t escape from getting trapped into it. Unfortunately, I was not good.

I smiled, had an angry face, turned my focus elsewhere, yawned, pretended to get into sleep, expressed dis-interest and nothing helped me. For most of the discussions, I was silent and did not have an answer. It was nearing mid-night and talk stopped slowly and they were onto their dream world.

I was angry about him and her. I am not sure whether I can find him, but I need to talk to her. I need to spend days here and this cannot go on for long. Plan for that weekend was finalized.

Packed with two pair of dress, I headed towards her city. The bus break-down was not a good sign, but I was least bothered. It was midnight, when I got down the bus stand. I was a little confused. Would I have chosen to come the next day morning? Now without proper commute, how am I going to reach her.

Occupied with the thought and fear, I slowly walked out of the bus stand and entered a lonely broad road. I just walked without any purpose, stood for some time and began to walk. Should I do this or sit / rest at some place until sun comes back. Did not decide, but still walked.

It was a signal and I crossed in a direction that my leg took me.

As I could see, it was a red Audi and was lacking control. Why are people driving so raaaaaaa…………………….

…………………………………………………….

…………………………………………………….

----

Me, Now

“I am ashamed. I am ashamed to be myself. I am ashamed of what I am doing.

I was, and am deeply involved in all my projects and never thought that the involvement can cause such a devastation. My perception was that, without a feel of what I have to do, I should not take up any project.

Where do you draw the line? I never intended to draw a line, and let both the life mix with one another.

The strain I experience is humongous. I am extremely unorganized, rude and uncourteous because of the current project.

This reached a peak, a month ago.

I denied a project offer that I got from him who introduced me here. He was upset and even I was. But I could not correlate myself to the role and hence I could not help that.

And the same day, it happened.

On the road, I saw someone upside down. I could see blood oozing and her mother was crying aloud without knowing what to do. I called up Ambulance. They came and as they took her, I could get to see the mother’s pain and her trauma.

All through the way home, I could not collect myself back.

I cried, cried and cried.”

I cried. The people around tried to come and console. I signaled them to stop and continued,

“But then, after my eyes dried up, I gathered back, called my director guru and accepted to do the role of a mother who lost her daughter.”

I could not control my emotions and cried loud.

“Cut… Excellent shot – a long shot that is done in a single take – very rarely seen in recent days”. I heard that from the director. Everyone congratulated and said that I might get my second award for this role.

Who can say when I can come out of the involvement.

Who will know that I was great in this scene because of the real experience that I had. Why should I have to explicitly say that, in real, the casualty was a HE. How will I convey that I was the one who hit him, as I was high on that day night. When am I going to say that, in real, I was the mother also. Will he come back and say that he is my illegitimate child. Whom will I say that I accepted the offer because of this incident and I got the award for my involved acting in the movie.

Yes, I am an actress and I act less. 

S(HE) — A Double Whammy

7/8/90: 20:45

“Passengers your Kind Attention Please, Train number 1 6 5 2 6 Island Express from Bangalore via Ernakulum, Kollam, Trivandrum towards Kanyakumari is expected to depart from platform number 7 shortly”

Netra was well settled in her berth, with all the accessories set as per her need for a day long journey. Still she was seen a little restless.

He came running and her restlessness took rest.  He came by the window, handed over a CD. “Here you go Netra, Arindam’s recent album. This attitude of yours is not good for you and for others. Why can’t you buy this once you reach our home?”

“No, this is how a fan reacts to her idol singer, in fact I am late by one day, this CD was released yesterday”

“This is crazy Netra”

“I am even crazier, when I touch this CD, I feel like I am touching him”

“Shut Up… Amma is very seriously seeing an alliance for you.”

“Yeah I know, I have told her to see someone like Arindam or even Arindam himself”.

“Are you kidding …?”

“Do you think so …?”

Train crawled.  “Ok take care, Call me as soon as you reach home and keep SMS ing at regular intervals”

“Sure, you too take care... Will keep you posted” Train moved front as he stood and waved his hands

Netra jumped and pumped her fist in air, until she noticed the way others looked at her. She giggled with in her and went to her berth, with CD player loaded with her favorite new CD.  

Lying down, she got lost into the songs of her favorite Arindam.

---------

She got down. Station was looking totally different compared to how it was last time. With a mild surprise, she started walking towards the exit. On the way, she noticed she was the only one who got down at that station. It was so much deserted. With fear creeping in slightly, she tried to increase her speed. As she reached the exit, she was shocked when someone touched her shoulder and asked, “Can you tell me whether this exit takes us to the temple road?”

She turned with fear and the fear turned into excitement, “ARRRRINDAMMMMM”

Aridam with mild smile, “Yes it is me. Would you mind me spending time with you?”

“Am I dreaming…. Ouch”, the pinch was real….

She had no words to say and she was blank for a while.

She regained herself and said, “Of course, sure, I can ask for something better than this... I hope you can spend one full day, i.e. today with me... I will take you to all places in this city, this is my home town and I know every corner of this place”

“Thank you... I am not interested in visiting places; I want to be with you, for today and all through”

Netra almost fainted; Arindam held her in his arms and it was a fairy tale for her... She blinked her eyes as he lifted her.

They both walked out and walked together in the roads. They were holding their hands together and he was talking and she was just listening.

Walk with Arindam made her unaware of the fact that the road, even though looked familiar, had lots of variation from normalcy.

He is the Piper and she is rat sometimes and a kid sometimes. He found them a house at a remote place in the city. She had never seen that place. A lengthy lawn in front of the house invited them. In both sides of the lawn, varieties of red roses, increased the aroma and hence the romance between them. The house was filled with everything, including her dreams and love. 

One fine (can it be called so?) day, she got up very late and noticed Arindam still sleeping. Adjusting her hair, she slowly walked towards the balcony. Hibiscus was budding and she was excited to see the flower’s baby. It was she who wanted to keep flower plants and Arindam wanted to focus on fruits. They both had nothing to lose, so they filled the garden with both of them equally. Every day routine had yet another romantic schedule of watering all those plants.

When she was walking towards the garden, for a change, alone, she saw a middle aged man, planting a sapling in the house next to theirs.  Seeing he, made her realize that, in the cozy cuddle of Arindam, she forgot everything. As she walked more closely to the fence, she thought about many things that she had not thought so far, since they both came to that place. How long it could have been? Where are we now? How did Arindam know that I am his ardent fan? How did he find this nice place in my home town, which I have not seen any time before? All these questions boggled her mind and by that time the neighbor smiled at her and walked slowly near to her.

“Hello Uncle, I am Netra”

“Hi Netra, your name sounds very beautiful as you look. I am here from past 2 days and how about you?”

She had an uncomfortable smile, “We must be here for past one month uncle”

Must be???? Uncle had traces of puzzled thought which he tried to avoid expressing, but failed.

“Good... Whom are you with you here Netra, family or with friends”

“Uncle, I am with Arindam ...” she stopped suddenly.

Who is he to me?? What is this relationship called? Is this acceptable -- her bank of questions increased.

“Arindam ... when were you married, must be a honeymoon couple – right??”

She gave a word-less expressive answer to that question, which even she was not sure what that meant.

Both of them felt uncomfortable and as they were trying to wind up that scenario, Netra, saw Arindam walking towards them.

She felt relaxed and said, “Uncle he is Arindam. He is the one who found this house”, looking towards Arindam, “Arindam, he is our new neighbor, who came here just two days back”

Uncle showed a shock at his face that changed in to fear and then a sympathetic expression towards Netra. He closed eyes, took a deep breath, opened his eyes, “Ok Netra, Take care. Let us talk sometimes Come over to my house, whenever you are free.” He left

Netra was not sure how to interpret his reaction. She turned towards Arindam and asked about the same.

Arindam had a grin face and told, “That’s ok Netra, people, when they reach their middle age start feeling envious about young age people. You need to be careful about such people. They are more dangerous than terrorist. So better avoid this man”.

Netra started walking behind him. But she did not feel that bad about neighbor uncle and she was not sure of why he and Arindam reacted the way in which they both did. She became more anxious and she decided to go to his house when Arindam goes out. But, so far with him, he has never gone out. Doesn’t he go for his recording? What is the next album he is planning for? Is he not getting any new film chance? Again her questions dominated her thoughts.

By early afternoon, Arindam gave her a chance, “Netra, I need to go and meet a producer in your city. He said he has a good story line, for which he wants me to compose and sing few songs. I will meet him and come back. Take care and be careful, don’t step out of our house”.

Netra made sure Arindam went out of sight. She locked her house, walked towards the next house, knocked the door. Uncle came and opened the door,

“Come in Netra. So nice of you to come to my house. “

Netra had a glance of the house. It looked completely organized. It had more books than furniture. He had a divan at the hall. With a small kitchen, a bed room and a study room, the house looked perfect for one person. Both his study room and hall was filled with books.

“Sit down ma… I will get you some tea and biscuits, make yourselves comfortable”.

“Its ok uncle, I just came down to talk some times, don’t trouble yourself with tea”

By that time, she was glancing the books in the book shelves and the few that are scattered on the floor. Most of them are related to brain, psychology, philosophy and mythology.

Uncle appeared with his tray of two cups tea and few biscuits.  An uncomfortable silence prevailed. Both of them were sipping the tea and munching the biscuits.

Uncle broke the silence, “How do you know Arindam, Netra”

She just elaborated the whole event history. She had a slight fear that cropped every now and then, as she talked, about whether Arindam will be comfortable about her coming and talking with uncle.

Uncle told, “If you don’t mind, can you come to my study room”

She thought he is going to show some of his books and followed him to his room. The study room had a small room inside, which she did not notice when she came just a few minutes earlier. That small room had a chair as in dentist hospital.

He asked her to sit in that. She felt uncomfortable. She said, “No Uncle, I am not comfortable. What are you upto…. Arindam told me not to talk to you, but still I came here. You are proving that Arindam is correct. I am going to my house, please maintain your limits... otherwise I might have to call Arindam”.

Uncle smiled and said, “Ok call him”

Netra then realized, she does not have his mobile and she was not sure where her mobile was,” Do I have that at the house or did I lose it during the train journey? Did I survive so far without my mobile phone?”

Uncle said, “Netra, don’t get shocked on what I am going to say to you… “

Netra did not know whether to stay or to run away. She felt that she was being mesmerized. Somehow she piled up the courage and said, “Uncle, that’s ok, whatever it is  ... I will go home now and come again with Arindam. You tell whatever shocking news you have when I am with Arindam”, she started slowly moving out of the study room towards the house gate.

Uncle raised his voice, “Come on Netra, listen to me, there is no one called Arindam, who is staying with you... You need to understand that”

Netra just stood frozen.

“What??”

“Yes... You need to believe me, I am a psychology doctor and have experience in this field for more than 25 years. What you are undergoing is called Schizophrenia”

She had no clue of what he is talking.

“When you introduced me to Arindam today morning, there was no one near to you that is when I realized that you are suffering from this problem.  This happens to people who are mad about some celebrity, a role model or even any character whom they see every day. The character can be even some body that they have not seen at all. I am sure you were mad about the famous singer Arindam and you wanted to see him, touch him and be with him.”

“Do you mean to say I am all alone for the past few days and have been thinking he is with me? If so why did he leave me today?”

“Yes all through these days, you have been alone and just alone. The moment you started coming back to reality, by seeing me and outside world, slowly you will see your imaginary character moving away. But now you are entering into a more difficult situation. As long as he had been with you and you both are “just you both”, the character had completely pervaded your thought and he was good and warm to you, now that he is on and off, he is going to try and control you at situations that you do not expect.  The thoughts will disturb you more often and he is going to be trouble you against to how he was pampering you so far. “

Netra cried and agonized.

“Don’t worry. Anything that is created can be destroyed and every problem has a solution. Let us meet more often and I will get you a complete solution.”

Netra underwent various rigorous treatment sessions and she could realize his association with Arindam or so called him, is slowly fading away.

She was not sure whether she was happy or sad about that. She had her best time of her life, when she was with him, but, when it was getting clear to her it was not him, but her thought of him being with her, she could not accept the same.

After a lengthy session, she slept for a long time and before she went for sleep, uncle had told her that the treatment is almost over and she is going to be completely normal and he is completely out of him.

It was the first thought that came to her as she woke up. He was gone. And, soon, this bedroom, the house in whose eastern corner it sat, and the tiny garden outside with its gnarled old red hibiscus and the half-grown mango tree they had planted together, all those would be gone as well. It was the strangest feeling ever.

She felt a void spread over everywhere. She did not know what to do. She started touching grounds now. Slowly she started thinking, why did not my parents call me? Why did not my brother check about my train journey and the new CD? Fine, even though I have lost my mobile phone, why did not they come to rescue me? But how will they know my location? Yes may be they are also still searching for me. How bad it has been for me – I don’t even know how long I have been like this. I need to check with neighbor uncle about my whereabouts and try to contact my parents. He should have a cell phone or at least a land line.

Netra ran towards her next house, knocked the door. Uncle came and opened the door.

“Uncle!! May be my parents are searching for me badly and trying to reach out to me at my cell phone. Can you please give me you mobile phone or show me where you have kept your land line phone? I need to urgently talk to them. I will feel much better once I see them and go to my house.”

Uncle gave a frustrating smile and went inside his room, without answering anything. As usual she did not understand his expression, but she thought he will come back with some answer and

She was waiting, waiting and waiting…..

---------

8/8/90: 08:45 – The Hindu New Paper

All passengers found dead in India’s most devastating train accident.

            The fire that caught up in the pantry car of the Island express that was running from Bangalore towards Kanyakumari spread to all the coaches. Fire charred all the passengers travelled, break van and the goods coaches.

God Proposes

“Klung”

Opening his third eye, Lord Shiva checked his phone. It was a whats app message from Mohammed, the Prophet. It read, “Jesus Christ agreed for the meeting. Let us meet tomorrow evening at your hills”. Smiling at the message, he continued his meditation.

Next day, they assembled.

Mohammed : “We gave certain guidelines and way of life for people to follow. Even though our individual guidelines are different in some sense, one common objective, we had is to make them lead a meaningful and happy life. But what we see as happening is totally the other way. This is disgusting and disturbing. What to do?”

Shiva : “Why can’t we take back what we gave them ?”

Jesus : “What do you mean ?”

Shiva : “Let us make the world void of religion”

Mohammed  : “If three of us feel, that is what is going to solve the problem, let us do it and see”

Jesus : “Fine, I feel there is no harm in doing that”.

Shiva : “Ok, when can do execute the plan”

Jesus : ”Now it is fag end of the year 9999, Now all the system might need an upgrade to handle the five digit year entry. Let us seamlessly include this change also”

All of them, “Done!!! Let us pray the almighty that this solves the problem”

---------------

Jan 1^st 10000 A.D

Tirupathi was considered to be one of the frequently visited hiking spot. Nagapatinam is a famous beach which had lots of resorts with water game. Mecca and Medina had become an international trade arena, where business people from all over the world flocked to sell and buy various products.

Dictionary software read, “There are no results for: religion”

School / college application form did not ask for caste.

Typical matrimony sites read,

“Educated, well salaried male needed for a 24 year old girl. Girl’s blood group is A+. Guys with same or compatible blood groups are accepted”

---------------

Gayatri was busy getting ready for her college. She has to catch three buses and then walk for 20 minutes to reach her college. She has to travel so far every day because the house where she stays, with her family is their ancestral property and the college where she studies is her dream college. Her family is one of the few joint families that are still surviving in the 100^th century. She lives with her father’s elder and younger brother and their families.

“So what do I say to the guy’s family? Are you still confused?  Gayatri’s father asked

“Appa how many times I need to tell you and Amma, I do not want to get married to a guy who is the only son of a family and enter into a family where in, only I and he will be there. This alliance that you showed me, the guy is here and the parents are very far, they met once a year and I do not know what a family means there.... I am confident that you will find a better guy for me who satisfies with my only condition”

“Ok .. will inform them and Let me try further“

----------

Syed hates to be in the queue because he feels highly uncomfortable in crowd. 

When his turn came, he was queried, “What do you prefer – Single room or share with 2 or 4 of your classmates?”

Syed replied, “No sharing, please give me a single room and I suppose I can retain this room for all four years of my studies”

“Yes!! You can hold the room though out your stay here. But single room costs you 15K extra per year”

Syed, “That’s fine. I will pay for it”. After completing all the formalities, he went to his abode and settled.

His phone rang,  “Hi Mom, Yes I am settled, yep got a single room.”

“Syed Beta, this is the first time, you are so far from us. You need to mingle with your friends, so that you don’t feel the loneliness. If you start missing us, you will not be able to focus on studies”

Syed, “Don’t worry, I will adjust. I have lots of friends here, Sydney Sheldon, Jeffrey Archer, Malcom Gladwell, Zakir Hussain, HariPrasad Chaurasia and many more. They will take good care of me and I will also have a good load of study work.”

 “Come on Syed, apart from all of them, you should also get good friends whom you meet every day, share your feelings and enjoy these four years”

“Will take care ma , you and papa take care and keep calling”

“You never give a hold on this topic, anyways, hope time will change you, take care and we miss you”

----------

“ Café Latte with extra sugar”

“Mam, we do not add sugar, you can add as much as you want. Please wait for 7 minutes, your coffee will be ready. Your good name Madam”

“Gayathri…. Will wait “

1, 2, 3, 4, 5 , 6 , 7 minutes later

“Mr Syed”

Syed went and collected his coffee, at the same time, Gayathri heard her name and she also went to collect.

Syed : “Thoooo, what is this ?? I asked expresso and you gave me café Latte -- you say, a lot can happen over coffee, if coffee is going to be like this, that “lot” cannot happen”

Gayatri could not control her laughter, she busted out, where in all her friends joined.

“Sorry Sir, I think your coffee got swapped with Madam’s”

He swapped the two coffees.

Syed anger intensified, he threw the coffee cup on to the dust bin and was about to walk out.

Gayatri : “Sorry, Mr Syed. I could not have laughed, but your expression made me do so. I shall help you get a new coffee”.

“Thank you…. Miss whatever. I don’t need your sympathy”

He just walked off.

Gayathri felt bad and did not participate much in her friends’ discussion. She was waiting for a chance

----------

“Chances do not happen they need to be created” – notice board reminded her.

She met him on the way, tried to initiate a talk

“I am sorry again. I know you would have felt bad... Are you fresher?? I am here for three years and I can help you in any way you want... You need any help?

There was Silence. But he did not leave the place also. He stood there with his face down.

She continued, “Is this the first time, you are far from your parents. You need to mingle with friends, so that you don’t feel the loneliness. If you start missing your home, you will not be able to focus on studies”

He just lifted his face, had a close look at her. These were the words that her mother repeats many times when she calls him.

He had tears in his eyes and said, “Can you help me get into the momentum here??  I hate to be with any one, but nothing happens here with help from others. So I really do not know what to do”

She smiled and extended her hands over his shoulders and started walking with him.

They walked and talked, talked and walked, talked when they walked and walked when they talked.

----------

“If we want to take this to next level, we need to talk to our parents”

“Do you think they will agree ??”

“They will…. Why not ??”

“What if they did not ?”

“We need to make them agree – are you saying we will go against them”

“I did not say that – but am just indicating you about that possibility”

“Ok you tell me – if they do not accept what we do”

“I am ready to do all what is to be done to be with you throughout our life”

“Does it mean, we need to be on our own?”

“Let us not give chance for this to happen. Are we not confident that they will agree, after all they have done all good for us and they want our happiness?”

“Even I feel so. Ok let’s do this – I need to go out of town for one week.  By next weekend when we meet after I come back, let us discuss with our parents – done??”

“Done – 5 days without you … please compensate”

Compensation extended and extension terminated half-minded.

----------

Dad: “What?? No way … how can you even think of doing this “,

Mom: “What are their family involved in – what is their profession “

Dad: “What do they eat, what are their daily practices?”

Mom: “They will not keep you happy after marriage – listen to us, We will look a very good alliance for you not like the one whom you looked at “

“Dad/Mom - we will live very happily – we know each other well. We know we make a good pair.”

Dad: “Knowing each other well ? that cannot happen even if you are together for hundreds of years. Marriage is a Gamble. If you get married to the one we look at, you will be very well supported by the family and all the relatives. But you go alone; you might miss all the support”

“Why Dad, will you not support if I pick up my life partner ? Why should it always need to be picked up by you ? “

Dad , “ Listen to me .. you are my child, you have to follow what I say, we have seen positives and negatives of the life .. I do not want you to get into trouble… “

“How can you decide and finalize that I am getting into trouble”

Dad, raising his voice, “Shut up… you are marrying the one whom I look for you, if you are looking otherwise, you are not my child, you will have to face the consequences yourself”

Mom, “None of our family members will be happy about what you are doing and as you know, they might totally reject you on what you are doing.. Please child, think twice thrice and say no to this love and other feelings … We do not have the guts to see you suffer.. “

“No Mom , why do you think we will suffer”

Dad: “Enough of this - -do whatever you want to – we disown you  ... get last”.

Conversations in both their houses were not different from any of the above dialog sequences.

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Syed and Gayatri didn't mean to fall in love. But love happens when you least expect it. It creeps up suddenly, when someone needs attention, care, conversation, laughter and maybe even intimacy. Love doesn't look at logic, or at backgrounds and least of all, profession.

Gayatri was from a very conservative South Indian family. Syed bought goats for his family every important occasion. That said the difference and more. Their paths would never have crossed if it hadn't been for that fateful day. That day when he walked into the coffee shop. Gayatri wondered if destiny chose our loved ones for us. Did we have any role to play at all?

She looked at her watch. Syed was late. They met every Thursday at five pm to catch up. Their conversation lasted for hours. Sometimes at the cafe, sometimes in his car, sometimes in places that she could never tell her friends about. They would never understand. And yet Syed made her happy.

Suddenly her phone beeped. He had sent a message. "On my way. Have something important to tell you."

Gayatri stared at it and realised she had knots in her stomach. Thoughts flooded her mind. What did he want to tell her?

For a change, Syed was late and his eyes were red. Gayatri did not have to hide her emotions and both of them just busted out as they saw each other.

“Go against them ??”

“Yes.. “

“Fine… Next  Monday , Register office at the end of this road”

----------

“Looking extra Romantic, what is the reason?? “

 “Don’t remember ?...we together have successfully completed one month away from our parents “

“Oh!! Yeah time to celebrate.. What shall we do ?”

“Its long time … Let us have chicken biriyani, watch an action packed Hollywood movie and in the night lets open up ….. “

“Open up … ?? Open up what ??

“I mean Champagne”

“My dear lover boy, I do not eat chicken biriyani, I hate Hollywood movies and that too action one and I do not drink … I can bare the movie for you, rest you do. I can be with you.. “

“Come on…. Don’t bring down the euphoric feeling, we did all together, lets enjoy together”

“Sorry, dude, I cannot change some habits that are with me for a long time”

“What ?? you cannot change – I have changed my self. I have not touched any piece of non-vegetarian so far… you know I eat twice  a day and now I have not seen it for a month”

“Even I have changed a lot..  for your sake , I make and take chapathi, with the kurma as per you taste”

“Don’t say you make kurma  as per my taste – I take so spicy and you make such a bland unpalatable one – I just eat because you should not feel bad”

“Yes, the amount of spice you ask is not good for health and that is why I reduce... I am doing good for you “

“If that is case, do good for me now – eat chicken biriyani with me “

“No I can’t do that “

“Is this what you call tolerance?”

“If this is not what else – it has to be both the ways”

“Gayatri – you are hurting me “

“What are YOU doing then ?”

“I could have listened to my mother”

“You can do that even now”

“You mean it “

“I don’t want to .. but you are forcing me to”

“Let us not force any one .. let us be independent”

 “what do you mean “

“I mean what I mean”

Syed just banged the door and walked away.. Gayatri rolled a salty liquid through her chin….

----------

Mom : “At least today , take this medicine.. it is not good  to stay without medicine for more than a month”

Dad  : “What is the point .. when your own people go against, you feel you are rejected “

Uncle : “ Anna  !!! Mhmmm.. every one will pay for the mistake that they have done “

Dad : “  I do not want my child to suffer”

Uncle :  “No I will not let our kid suffer. I will save our little one Anna... Don’t worry, I will take care of this “

----------

I am leaving… it was not love, but just infatuation.. Have fun, if possible, bye

Syed was rattled reading the message. He did not think she will take it seriously, his anger faded away, but she held on to that.

I need to stop her... He rushed to their house and found it locked. He enquired with the neighbor, they said, “Did she not tell you  ... she said she is going to her mom’s place”

“When did she leave?”

“Just now – may be 5 minutes back”

Syed thought if he goes fast, he will be able to catch her. He rushed and sped up his bike.

She could see her bike parked near a medical shop. He was relaxed. He parked his bike and just walked slowly towards her bike

He could see her coming out.. his heart was beating more than regular.

She saw him, he smiled. He could not recognize her expression.

When he reached her more close, that happened,

Three men with helmet came fast in a bike, all with lengthy Sickle. As they neared him, they played on him randomly with sickle, until he soaked in a pool of blood.

As they flew away, she rushed to him, held him as he fell down. In the shock, she held his hand and feel over him.

----------

“Klung”

Whats app message for meeting.

Lord Shiva, Jesus Christ and Mohammed, the Prophet met again

“So, Religion is not the only reason”

“So how do we stop this catastrophe?”

“Make every one vegetarian?”

“Make every one do all profession?”

“Make parents separated from children at some age?”

 “May be this …?”

“May be that…?”

“This and that???”

God Proposes and Man disposes!!!